Roy Tang

Someone on quora asked:

Do you ever feel like you put on a mask when going out and socializing?

There’s a saying (I first encountered a version of it in the novel Shogun): “The Japanese say you have three faces. The first face, you show to the world. The second face, you show to your close friends, and your family. The third face, you never show anyone. It is the truest reflection of who you are.”

It’s a simplification, and it doesn’t apply only to the Japanese. People choose how to present themselves to different audiences. This is because no matter how self-confident we are, on some level we still crave other people’s approval, so we tailor how we present ourselves depending on what we perceive the audience we face will approve of.