Roy Tang

I am a man of many things, of many passions. I work as an engineer, remodelling space shuttles so that they don’t crash and burn on reentry. I play the piano, the trombone and the harmonica. I am a columnist for an internationally acclaimed newspaper. I produce and direct award-winning movies. To relax, I write full-length novels, solve transcendental math problems and practice karate, taekwondo and aikido.

I save people from drowning, I protect children from danger, I patrol the streets for litterbugs and jaywalkers, I go to government offices and streamline their processes. I hunt down terrorists, I foil coup attempts, I dismantle nuclear weaponry. I feed the hungry and visit the sick. I write the software that hunts down viruses and protects the internet. I wage war against poverty and take down corrupt politicians. I am wanted in thirty-one states and outlawed in fifty countries.

I sew clothes for orphans, I bake cookies for prisoners of war, I read stories to the terminally ill. I have read the Bible, the Iliad, and the works of Shakespeare, all in one sitting. I have memorized the streets of New York, Madrid, Egypt, Beijing and Manila. I served in covert operations in Vietnam and Desert Storm. I have set up research centers to determine the cure for cancer and the secret of immortality. I am never late, I do my taxes months ahead of schedule, I can recite Pi up to the 2000th digit. I never sleep, I cannot be surprised, I make the most of my time.

I stare death in the eye. I bungee jump, I skateboard off high cliffs, I eat Akane Tendo’s cooking. I clean up oil spills, I round up lost dogs, I play Santa Claus on Christmas Eve. I have defeated the evil witch, rescued the princess and single-handedly defended the Earth from an alien invasion, armed with nothing more than a swiss knife and duct tape.

I am a conqueror, I have defeated armies and destroyed nations. I am a lover, I have wooed a hundred women. I am an artist, I have painted murals in every city and written songs in every language. I am a scientist, I have defied and disproven the laws of physics. I am an athlete, I have won twenty gold medals in the last three olympics. I am a spiritualist, I have uncovered the meaning of life yet chose to keep it hidden.

I am a man of myth and legend, tales of my exploits abound in the darker areas of the night. I am a man of the world, journeying to many places to seek out fame and fortune, protect the innocent and for great justice. I walk my own way, I seek my own truth, I determine my own fate. I stand tall and shake the heavens. When I move, the crowds give way to let me pass. When I speak, the world stops to listen. When I shout, the universe holds its breath.

I am nature’s greatest miracle. I am the one foretold by legend, whose coming will be the beginning and the end. Prophets and sages speak my name in whispers, beasts of the jungle scatter when I approach, kings and presidents tremble in my presence, yet children come to me and adore me. I will incite war and destruction, and I will unite all nations under my wing. I am anger, I am fear, I am madness. I am light and shadow, I am order and chaos, I am life and death. I am judge, jury and executioner. I am your greatest dream. I am your worst nightmare. I am your finest hour. I am your darkest day. I am the one you seek, the one you wish to be, the one who decides your fate, I am Roy Tang.

(Written more than 3 years ago)