Roy Tang

Programmer, engineer, scientist, critic, gamer, dreamer, and kid-at-heart.

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[Originally posted to the GameFAQs message boards]

Now, there are rude and annoying people everywhere, especially on the internet. And normally, I don’t care, I just ignore them. On battle.net, I just let them be, and keep on playing. Every so often however, some guy comes along who just pisses me off completely.

So I play random 3v3, right? It’s not the most “skillful” type of battles, but it’s fun and I enjoy it. My record’s nothing too good to look at, but I wouldn’t call myself a newb. I play a game, I get a team with a lvl 27, two lvl 16s (I’m one of them)

Soon as the game starts, the 27 guy (Green) asks us “You guys any good?” Now, some people may or may not realize this, but this is rude. There’s no point in asking, I don’t think there’s any satisfactory answer that can be given. And many people don’t like to brag, so more often than not your answers will be along the line of “I guess so”, “I’m not so bad”, or if your allies are insecure, “I’m sucky.” But you almost never get the answer you want. You can check their stats if you want, but why bother asking them if they’re good?

Anyway, I normally just ignore these questions, and I did. And smartly enough, my other ally, the other 16 guy (Blue) ignored him as well. I’m not sure why I was stupid enough to do it, but when he asked again, I responded: “I won 12 out of the last 15, does that make me good?” It was true; I was on some sort of streak I guess.

His answer was: “No it doesn’t. I hope you guys don’t play like level 16, or we’re gonna lose.” Yeah, like level means anything in random team battles any more.

So we go to harass, and he’s all “I don’t wanna leave my base, I’m gonna get rushed.” And since he wants it, sure enough he gets rushed. We go back, we fend it off, and he’s really thankful: “I’m really sick of being rushed, that’s why I don’t harass. Let’s just creep.”

So we split up and take the greens. (The map was that 6-player one with all the water. Typhoon? I’m not sure.) A while later, we get a message. His Level 1 Dark Ranger got killed by creeps. He’s embarrassed. “OMG! That’s so nobish [sic] of me! I’m so embarrassed!”

We creep some more, we run into 2 of the enemy armies, take out a few fiends and grunts before they run back. He sees my army. “OMG mass hunts!” he says, even though I told him early on I was getting hunts and dryads. He must’ve been too busy whining to himself about his noob teammates.

We decide to hit the orc base. We go in, And the battle is fairly furious, a lot of units die. I get messages saying my allies’ heroes go down, so I give the “b” word. We start falling back. Green gets started again.

“OMG pink [me], there’s no way you won 12 of 15, you’re such a noob! You’re a liar!”

Okay, that’s it. I could handle arrogant allies, but this one had the balls to call me a liar. I rip into him.

“Listen here. I’m not the one who lost his hero while creeping. I didn’t lose any heroes back there. In fact, I killed 3 heroes before we pulled out. What have you been up to?”

That shut him up. Blue, by the way, has been cool all this time, just letting Green be. Anyway, Green starts lagging. I start pumping out archers and dryads to counter the wyverns. Green’s base gets attacked. I TP in. We push them back. We head back to the orc base for a counteroffensive.

He’s lagging some more. I fire another shot: “You know what the best part is? Your clever moonwell placement has trapped my keeper in the trees.”

We hit the orc base, taking out grunts and shamans and wyverns and fiends left and right. Green lags out. Good riddance. We pull out for a bit to regroup. I take control of Green’s army, Blue handles his base. We hit the orc base again. Towers and burrows start going down. We sweep, we clean up, we wipe the floor (all without my Keeper, still cluelessly stuck between moonwells. The Priestess misses him so.) Just before the game ends, I tell Blue my not-so-secret opinion: “Green was an idiot.”

Sadly, I forgot to save the replay. I don’t even remember who Blue was. I do remember who green was however, and I have a message for him.

This is for you, III_III of Lordaeron. Free advice, if you can’t be nice to your teammates, or if you can’t stand playing with “noobs”, either stop playing random teams, or shut the hell up. And it’s 14 out of 17 now moron.

Thanks for listening GameFAQs. That is all.

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